I’ve been called selfish today and I was unsure of the accuracy of that statement and how I should be feeling about it.
I’ve been told that I sometimes came across as prickly and generally difficult as well. I believe that it was often the case that I came acorss that way precisely because I questioned how altruistic my thoughts and rationale truly were, and that made me somewhat defensive for some reason.
In my head, I’ve always felt that I must do what is best for myself in order to be able to do what is best for a large number of people someday. I prefered impacting a substantial number of lives instead of a few. I was unsure of whether this was egocentrism or passion. It might have been a mixture of both. One might have been temporarily needed in order to engender the other. All I knew was that I wanted to make a difference, and if that made me come off as egomaniacal than so be it.
My time was limited on this earth and I did not want to waste it on non value-adding activities and a low-impact life.